‘Some things are within your control. And some things are not.’ Too often we may find ourselves trying to control things that we cannot ultimately control, and an intense frustration may ensue from this. Epictetus, the author of this quote, said that this realisation of control is a principle which must be understood if one wants to be happy and free. Friedrich Nietzsche wrote of amor fati (love of fate), an idea that we should not become frustrated with the way things are, but rather that it is fate and so we should, perhaps, maintain a certain distance from the events around us, particularly the ones we dislike. In Fight Club, Tyler Durden says: ‘Stop trying to control everything and let go!’ It may be the case that at times we must prevent ourselves from trying to impose our power over everything, and instead just accept how things are.
This is not to say that there is nothing we can control. There are some things which we can influence. Yet there are many more things which we cannot. Acceptance of the uncontrollable is another step, and it may be the first, to freedom.